Zip it up

Another tidbit of Crazy Syl's Mothering Advice - take with a grain of salt and a glass of Shiraz.

Everyone told me how they had zipped up their kid's skin in their jammies at least once while I was pregnant with Kitten, and I swore I was a better mother. I would NEVER do that. I would be more careful.

And when I had an infant, I developed the first finger system, where I run the zipper with my thumb and middle finger and crook my first finger in behind the zipper. Brilliance! I could never zip my kid's skin with this system. I am the smartest mother in history.

But pride goeth before the fall, and an infant is a far cry from a toddler. I am lucky to get the jammies zipped without performing wresting moves on the kids, much less utilizing the first finger system. Now I know that moms who zipped their kids were just trying to get the zipper up while their toddler was turning away and wriggling to get your grip off their ankle.

So, be careful with the thoughts of being better and coming up with the ingenious systems - the kids change from day to day and what may have worked yesterday doesn't work tomorrow.

And don't judge your mother until you have walked a mile in her footie jammies.

We hit the wall

Meimei finally pushed matters too far last night.

She's been crying in the evenings this week and refusing to go to sleep. She was refusing a bottle. And last night, at 12:30, she woke up and pulled it. In the middle of the night. Well, mama will take a lot of getting up, and mama will take a lot of late-night bottle feeding, but there is a line. And it was crossed.

I will not feed a meal in the middle of the frickin' night.

So now, Miss Meimei can cry it out at night until she starts sleeping through. No bottles, no getting up. We let her cry last night, and I was able to go back to sleep, so I don't know how long it was. Pants had to go sleep downstairs. It should only take another night or two to work it out.

Point is: She got greedy, so she got cut off.

That is Crazy Syl's advice - cut 'em off when you can't take anymore. Take with a grain of salt and a glass of Shiraz.

Parental Advice?

I'm starting a new section of parenting advice - take with a grain of salt and several ounces of Shiraz.

My first bit of advice? When your children get to a certain age, oh, say, about 18 months - 2 years, people will buy them lovely wooden peg puzzles. The ones with the large wooden pieces that match the pictures underneath and have pegs on the top for easier grabbing for little fingers that are still learning how they work.

These are wonderful toys that help your children learn - by themselves even. Cherish them. But some of these puzzles have little solenoids. So that when you put the piece in, it makes a noise.

For the love of God, DO NOT PUT BATTERIES IN THIS TOY. This is a lovely puzzle UNTIL YOU PROVIDE A POWER SOURCE.

You will start to feel lazy, not getting out the screwdriver to take off the battery cover, and cheap because you won't put two double-As into your beautiful child's toy for their learning and enjoyment. BUT DO NOT GIVE IN.

I will tell you what happens if you do:

• The sound these puzzles make is akin to 80s electronic toys - tinny and bearing little resemblance to the advertised sound. What it lacks in clarity, it makes up for in volume. Your teeth will crawl back up into your skull.
  
• The children will run from this toy and never play with it again, diving into your lap and saying, "[S]Cared, mama, cared!"
  
• If you don't have all pieces in at all times (and trust me, you won't), the sound represented by the missing piece will go off EVERY TIME you turn off the lights. This is just a little thing that senses darkness, so it doesn't discern if you put in the piece or blocked out the sun. Although, you might be comforted to know the little ambulance siren will go off in the event of an apocalyptic meteor strike.
  

So, take my word for it. Save the batteries for the remote so you can rewind Elmo's World one more time.